Plateaus & Science Experiments

I lied when I said I wouldn’t workout post 10pm. I just got done with a hellacious session on that damn elliptical. When I first started using my machine, I used the ‘quick start’ function rather than selecting a program. The ‘quick start’ function is basically the bottom of the barrel. It’s one step above laying in bed in a coma, and yet, it kicked my ass for weeks. WEEKS!

I started using the actual programs about a month ago and I love it. I don’t have to worry about manually increasing my intensity. I don’t have to worry about ‘not doing enough’.

I tried out the ‘Interval’ program a few times and it wrecked me. It isn’t shy when it comes to throwing you a plethora of curve balls in terms of intensity.

Even though I can get through ‘Interval’ with minimal whining, my favorite program is ‘Ride in Park’. This program also varies intensity-wise, but it’s less… intense. For the most part, it allows you to keep a steady pace, but kicks it up a few notches here and there. I started on level 01 and have worked my way up to level 03 within two weeks.

I thought I would try something new tonight since I didn’t get home until 10pm after visiting with a friend of mine. Instead of my usual thirty-minutes, I dropped my workout down to twenty-five, but kicked up the intensity big time. BIG TIME. It was almost too big to handle.

I decided to try the ‘Plateau’ program on level 02, and boy did I regret it about two minutes in. The highest level of resistance I’ve powered through thus far during any program has been a ’4′ (which didn’t last long at all). This new program had me STUCK at a ’6′ for ten effing minutes straight! And before that ’6′? WAS ’5′. And before ’5′? WAS  ’4′.

Actually, I was thrown into level ’4′ two minutes into the session and that’s when it became clear to me that I was in deep shit. My poor little sausage legs. They can only take so much!!

With eight minutes to go, I repeated to myself, ‘Being fat is harder this than this!’ I asked myself if I wanted to ‘huff and puff’ for all of eternity or if I wanted to ‘huff and puff’ for the next eight minutes.

I am sure you can guess what my answer was. I stayed on that thing and made it through. I am tired, sore, but proud of myself. I know that I will have to face the machine tomorrow and that I will have to ask myself that question again:

“Which is harder?”

As previously mentioned, I hung out with a friend of mine after work. We stopped at our favorite Mom & Pop Sub Shop before heading to his house for movie night. I ordered what I deemed to be the least ‘dangerous’ item on the board — a turkey wrap, no mayo and no bacon, extra lettuce and tomatoes.

I was so hungry when we got to his house that I literally shredded through the wrapper if I was on a mission from God.

UM?

THEY FAILED TO HOLD THE MOTHER-EFFING BACON AND MAYO. I was fuming. Honestly, how hard is it to leave something out of a sandwich? God damn. I am getting mad just thinking about it!

Instead of screwing myself over because of the brain-dead girl behind the counter, I simply removed the small amount of turkey that wasn’t drowning in mayo and ate that for dinner. My friend offered me half of his massive chicken parmesan sub, but I declined twice. However, when he offered a third time, I ‘gave in’ and requested he share 1/4 of his sub rather than half of it.

Why did I decide to eat 1/4 of this breaded fried chicken breast doused in tomato sauce, draped in provolone, and stuffed inside a white sub roll? Circumstances.

If I refused his offer completely, I would have undoubtedly starved for the next four hours. A dip-shit sub shop + starving food addict = permission to eat everything in cupboards upon arriving home @ 10pm.

What would you have done?!

In addition to weighing my options/considering reality, I guesstimated the damage as follows:

- Sm ‘pile’ of turkey = 200 calories
- 1/4 chicken parm sub = 500 calories
——
700 calories total

I want to say that the turkey falls shy of my ‘worse-case’ guesstimate, but I did end up consuming a small amount of mayo-residue that simply cannot go unaccounted for. In terms of the sub, I checked out The Daily Plate and did some simple math to find the average of a few like-items. The average came out to be around 650 calories for a ‘regular-sized’ sub.

I might actually be under my calories for the day (I purposefully ate smart during the day to give myself 845 calories for dinner since I didn’t know where we’d end up for dinner), but I can’t be too sure. I would be happy with a ‘wash’ at this point.

I probably sound crazy with all the math and equations and weighing of options, but doing these things increases the ‘accountability’ factor. As someone that gobbled piles of food mindlessly, counting calories has forced me to become more mindful of what I am putting in my body.

Counting calories has also allowed me to make informed decisions if I go out. I don’t have to avoid these situations. Instead, I can enjoy them like a real-life person! Being able to enjoy myself without sabotaging and cycles of feeling like ass because I ate somewhere other than home is a MUST.

Still, I am open to the possibility that everything I just said is a total farce. I am open to the possibility that I think I am making good choices, but might not be. I still have a lot to learn about food. Stranger things have definitely happened!

This week will be a true test since I failed to prepare my own lunches, and instead, opted to buy lunch four days in a row. Oops!

Monday: Tossed (salad)
Tuesday: Au Bon Pain (tuna on wheat).
Wednesday: B Good (turkey burger on wheat)
Thursday: Tossed (salad)

And of course, there was tonight’s franken-dinner. Not to self: BE A GROWN-UP AND GO FOOD SHOPPING!!!

Oh, science experiments!